You can't have everything. If you have two people, regardless of their sex, and one takes four years off and the other doesn't, all things being equal, who will be a better attorney?

Not complicated! If a father stays home for four years it will be tough for him to re-enter the market in the same way it would be for a woman. People have to make tough choices in life. Not everyone needs to make $250 k a year at a big law firm.

I do not feel sorry for you. I wish I could get a few years off myself.